Selfish was always a dirty, negative word but now I'm finally beginning to realize that a good kind of selfish is healthy and necessary. I have to let go of my fear of hurting my ex's feelings and stand up for myself and my happiness.

He threw me away and he didn't want me until he saw that I was happy with someone else. He still only "sort of wants parts of me- sometimes".

No thank you...way too little and way too late.
I don't want to go back there.

I have someone who loves all of me at all times who fits me in every way.

He accepts me as I am and wants to be the one to accept me at my worst.

He makes me smile and makes me laugh.

He tells me frequently that I'm beautiful and he shows me even more often.

We click. We fit.

He's tailor made for me, sent straight from God.

Comments:

It takes awhile to get over and through a divorce. It really is a process, but you'll get through it. Just keep doing what feels right for you. You cannot sacrifice your own happiness because someone else is sad and regretful. It just doesn't work, I know.

comment by shesaidwhat on May 31, 2008 5:53 PM ()

thank youI know it's true but it's always nice to have reminders for when self doubt steps in.

reply by firststarisee on June 1, 2008 7:39 PM ()

You are right! That is a great attitude to have! I know my comment to your last post encouraged you to have him see that it isn't just because of your new love, but he also has to understand that you DO have a new love and you rather be with him. You can assure him that you, more than likely, would choose a new life for yourself, anyway, so "don't blame the new guy!" It's your choice and you are happy with it! You'd still like to be friends, but that's all it can be.

comment by grumpy on May 28, 2008 3:20 PM ()

thanks grumpy

reply by firststarisee on May 29, 2008 11:37 AM ()

Excellent. I have my soul mate as well. Nothing better

comment by teacherwoman on May 28, 2008 1:27 PM ()

what a blessing

reply by firststarisee on May 28, 2008 9:02 PM ()

awesome. I am so happy for you. Keep it up!!!

comment by lunarhunk on May 28, 2008 9:24 AM ()

I'm learning bro

reply by firststarisee on May 28, 2008 11:06 AM ()

Yes, being selfish is can be good. You must always take care of yourself before you are able to help others. It is finally your turn to care for yourself! YAY!

You've really made me smile.

comment by janetk on May 28, 2008 6:52 AM ()

I'm soooo glad I'm smiling with you sista!

reply by firststarisee on May 28, 2008 8:34 AM ()

The minute you cut the strings that still run between you and Mr. "Ex," you will be a new person, especially in your own eyes. You owe him absolutely nothing. You owe yourself everything. Go for it.

comment by jondude on May 28, 2008 6:06 AM ()

Thank you so much Jon, I need to hear that to believe it

reply by firststarisee on May 28, 2008 8:34 AM ()

We have to take care of ourselves, in order to be able to care for someone else. So, in that respect, as you said, selfish is a good thing. Many times, women focus on caring for others and let themselves go. It's perfectly OK for us to focus on 'us.'

comment by hopefields on May 28, 2008 12:24 AM ()

thank you kelli

reply by firststarisee on May 28, 2008 1:36 AM ()

I'm sooo happy for you!!

comment by dkelly on May 27, 2008 10:14 PM ()

thank you

reply by firststarisee on May 28, 2008 1:37 AM ()