]> http://greasy.com/honeybugg/index.html honeybugg's Blog en-us © 01:27:15 Greasy.com All rights reserved. Mon, Jul 01:27:15 7 GMT 30 http://greasy.com/honeybugg/4th_july_fundraiser_speech.html A wildly enthusiastic crowd gathers around a platform festooned with American flags and draped with red, white and blue bunting. Looserobes introduces Bugg in glowing terms and the candidate mounts the stag to the tune of Earth, Wind and Fire's "Written in the Stone" wearing her traditional Fourth of July attire....baggy khaki shorts, a tee shirt that sez "You got a PROBLEM With That?" and her famous butt ugly Hawaiian shirt topped off by a sweat stained,greasy Dodger cap of unknown vintag ... Fri, 4 Jul 2008 11:54:52 GMT http://greasy.com/honeybugg/interesting_conversation_maybelleen.html Good Tuesday Evening, Greasytown: As is her custom, Maybelleen stopped by this afternoon to collect the rent. We sat and shot the shit for awhile. Then I mentioned that this month was my one year anniversary living in this apartment. I raved about how content I was and how it just suited my needs, location-wise, price-wise etc. ....and what great landlords she and Cletus were. (Never miss a chance to suck up, I always say.) Then I said, as sort of half joke, half fishing expedition, "I hop ... Wed, 2 Jul 2008 00:52:48 GMT http://greasy.com/honeybugg/the_dew_kisses_morning_grass.html Good Evening, Mah Fella Amuricans: Coupla days ago I was reading the Drudge Report. It ran an article that suggested former president Bill Clinton (Big Baby-Ark.) was still hopping mad at prsumptive presidential nominee Barack Obama (Jackass- Ill.) for beating his (Bill's ) wife Hillary in the primaries. He was supposed to have said that Mr. Obama would have to "kiss my ass" to get his support for his (Obama's) campaign. Well..... Bill finally took one of Barry's phone calls. In a statemen ... Mon, 30 Jun 2008 22:43:08 GMT http://greasy.com/honeybugg/live_right.html Good Sunday Afternoon, Greasytown: Here is some backround to the situation I am about to relate to you: Some years ago, Cletus and Maybelleen had a tenent who lived in this apartment. The guy was a big creep and ran out owing them a coupla months rent. He left behind some crappy furniture and about 16,000 sports trading cards. Well, Cletus and Maybelleen sold the furniture to somebody but they couldn't get rid of the sports cards for some reason. So, one day Maybelleen was here inquiring a ... Sun, 29 Jun 2008 21:08:55 GMT http://greasy.com/honeybugg/25_things__via_brian_aj.html What is your favorite food?  Wendy's cheeseburgers, cheesecake Do you ever watch  "Cash Cab"?   yeah all the time. I love it and usually get most of the questions right. What do you think of Drew Carey as the new host of "The Price Is Right"?  I think he sucks for air.  He should go back to Cleavland and get his old job back at the department store.  When it's really warm do you ever walk around the house naked?  No, but I sleep that way sometimes when its unbearably hot at night. ... Sat, 28 Jun 2008 18:50:39 GMT http://greasy.com/honeybugg/good_things_life.html Good Thursday Evening, Greasytown: I do a lot of bitching, kvetching, whining and complaining about my lot in life on these hallowed pages so I thought I would take time to comtemplate some of the good things about my life. Yes, there actually are some. 1) My heart is still beating. Not like it should but its hangin' in there. 2) I have a decent apartment that is within my means and the landlords are kind and attentive. 3) I have Medicare that pays 80% of my health care and I have Part D w ... Fri, 27 Jun 2008 00:15:29 GMT http://greasy.com/honeybugg/imus_supreme_court_oooooo_.html Good Evening, Blog pals:      A coupla things on the news have crossed my bow and have ticked me off royal.      First of all, they're after my pal Don Imus again.  When discussing the latest criminal escapades of pro football buttwipe Adam "Pacman" Jones, Imus inquired as to his color. When informed that Jones was African-American Imus commented "well, there you go....now we know."  Fat, processed buffoon Rev. Al Sharpton states he's "looking into it" to determine if the comment ... Wed, 25 Jun 2008 23:20:44 GMT http://greasy.com/honeybugg/50_things__swiped_number.html What do you add to your coffee?   sweet-n-low What are you reading now? "Lincoln" by Carl Sandburg. It's 'assposed to be the definative biography of our 16th president and it's a monster.  I am finding it difficult at times to wade through some of Sandburg's flowery prose but I am making progress. Do you own a gun?   you bet yer ass. woe betide the shitpoke who breaks into this house. Are you registered to vote?  Absolutly.  Too many good people died so that I might have that right ... Wed, 25 Jun 2008 19:37:31 GMT http://greasy.com/honeybugg/comic_legend_george_carlin_passes.html 'Tis a sad day, blog pals.  Cutting edge comic legend and Bugg fave George Carlin died on Sunday.  He was 71.  Known for his biting wit, social commentary and sometimes salty language, Mr. Carlin was one of the innovators and forunners of todays comic talent.  I always found him side splittingly funny and am sad today that his comic light will no longer shine  He leaves behind a wife and a daughter.  In his memory, I'd like to offer a selection of some of his most humerous quotes. "F ... Tue, 24 Jun 2008 03:26:07 GMT http://greasy.com/honeybugg/poobah_candidate_eschews_public.html (AP, UPI, Briebart, People Magazine) Spokespersons for the Bugg For Poobah campaign said today that the campaign would not participate in the federal program to fund presidental campaigns. In a direct statement, the candidate herself said "I have always thought that public financing of presidential campaigns was lame. All the "soft money" floating around negates the noble purpose of the law's original intent. Once elected I intend to get this ridiculous program repealed. I, for one, can th ... Fri, 20 Jun 2008 10:01:54 GMT http://greasy.com/honeybugg/tuesday_evening_updates.html Good Evening, Greasytown:      I lounge here on the foton, watching as the neighborhhod goes about its evening bid'ness.  The race car people are working on a new model.  I went by the other day and they had a hollowed out frame of a what I assumed was once an automobile and informed me that they were building themselves yet another hot rod.  "Yep, this here'll be our fourth 'un"  I said "cool" and pretended to be impressed but was thinking "Swell...something else for you to rev up ... Wed, 18 Jun 2008 00:17:35 GMT http://greasy.com/honeybugg/veteran_newsman_tim_russert_dies.html Tis a sad evening, blog pals. Tim Russert, NBC Washington Bureau chief and host of NBC's long running news program "Meet the Press" passed today of a sudden heart attack. He was working on that very program in his Washington offices when he collapsed. He was rushed to a local hospital by paramedics who tried to revive him but to no avail. Mr. Russert leaves behind a wife, son and father "Big Russ" about whom he wrote a best selling book a number of years ago. Mr. Russert was only 58 years ... Sat, 14 Jun 2008 01:25:49 GMT http://greasy.com/honeybugg/fighting_dmv__oooooooopart.html Good Evening, Greasytown:      Lemme tell ya, I'm madder than a bear shitting tumb tacks.  Went to the DMV to renew my driver's license.  I checked carefully to make sure I had all the required proofs of indentity (old license, utility bill, voter registration, social security card etc etc).  When the license was issued three years ago,  they mispelled my middle name.  It's spelled JaspER ; they have it spelled JaspAR.  So I asked the overpaid, inbred, pinhead, slacker of a pu ... Fri, 13 Jun 2008 00:01:18 GMT http://greasy.com/honeybugg/open_letter_worthy_opponent_3.html To:  Sen. John S. McCain (Jackass- Arizona)  From: Poobah Candidate Honey J. Bugg (Who Gives a Shit- West By God) Dear John:      It's over.  I have found another and I want a divor.....oh wait....wrong letter.  sorry Dear Sen. McCain:      So now it is down to two.  Just you and the skinny black kid with the funny name.  You have yer work cut out for you.  I think you are up to the challenge, no matter how many wise cracks they might make about your age.  I read your book ... Mon, 9 Jun 2008 20:39:58 GMT http://greasy.com/honeybugg/sunday_evening_potpourri.html Good Evening, Greasytown:      Dang, aint it hot?  It's like 95 here now. The three "h's" ...hazy, hot and humid have kicked in with all six cylinders.  I sit amidst two  fans, one in front and one at the side so I have sort of a nice cross breeze going on.   I found my old, comfy, raggity tank top that I wouldn't dare wear out in public unless I wanted to get busted on an indecentcy charge.       We had a yard sale this weekend.  Maybelleen wanted to try and sell some cra ... Sun, 8 Jun 2008 21:57:52 GMT http://greasy.com/honeybugg/rude_awakening.html Good Morning Greasytown: Yes, I am up blogging at 3 Goddamn a.m. Now this is not unusual because as you all know, I have wicked insomnia. But I am awake this particular morning because Mrs. Inconciderate Jackass started blasting her music at this ungodly hour and woke my ass up. The shit started at about 2 a.m. and awakened me from precious, if fitful, slumber. Nothing on this earth makes me madder than being awakened. I mean, Jesus H. Christ, has the bitch never heard of headphones? So I ... Thu, 5 Jun 2008 07:41:03 GMT http://greasy.com/honeybugg/open_letter_worthy_opponent_2.html To:  Sen Hillary R. Clinton (Jackass-New York) From: Poobah Candidate Honey J. Bugg (Who Gives a Shit- West By God) My Dear Hill:       Well, girl, its all over.  Fun's fun and done's done.  You fought the good fight.  Now is the time for all good Jackasses to come together and support their presumptive nominee.   I must tell you, Hill, that you mounted a hell of a campaign....a campaign that also made history.  I so admire your toughness, your tenacity, and yes, even your ruth ... Wed, 4 Jun 2008 18:00:57 GMT http://greasy.com/honeybugg/remains_day.html Good Sunday Evening, Greasytown: Well, its been a good weekend for me so far. It's been quiet around here as the little puke across the hall and Mrs. Inconciderate Jackass upstairs have been gone since Friday evening. It was fabulous. Nothing but peace and quiet abounded. Mrs. Jackass is back now but that's ok. I'm satisfied with the hours of peace I did have. I am really proud of myself. I actually got out early this morning and walked around the block. Of course I was pumped full of Vico ... Mon, 2 Jun 2008 00:17:15 GMT http://greasy.com/honeybugg/halcyon_days.html A Good Thursday Evening, Greasytown It was a beautiful day, weatherwise today here in Devil's Asshole. The municiple pools (we have three of them) all opened up on Memorial Day, thus ushering in the official beginning of summer. I remember spending many a summer day just hanging out at the pool, getting a sun stroke, nibbling on big pretzel sticks with mustard on them, washing them down with a snow cone, stepping on used gum wads, and reading dirty passages on the walls in the bathroom (ye ... Fri, 30 May 2008 01:16:21 GMT http://greasy.com/honeybugg/sunday_evening.html Good Evening, Blog Pals: The sun is setting on a near perfect spring day, weatherwise. The kids are playing catch in the vacant lot, delicious smells that waft through the window tell me a number of cook outs are underway. Folks walk by with dogs, baby strolers, on bikes/skateboards. One of the dogs on a leash was a little white mop type dog. The German Shepard a coupla doors down barked at it and the game little mop yipped back, fiercely lunging against its leash as if saying "lemme at 'i ... Mon, 26 May 2008 01:08:21 GMT