http://greasy.com/janetk/index.html janetk's Blog en-us © 2008 Greasy.com All rights reserved. Fri, 25 Jul 2008 10:45:34 GMT 30 http://greasy.com/janetk/to-do_post.html The original title of this post was supposed to be: I SAW A SNOWFLAKE AND IT MADE MY HEART ACHE But first of all, it was too fucking long (ha!) and second of all, I live in Canada and I was scared that you would actually think I’d seen a snowflake this morning, falling softly past the window of my igloo. I didn’t. But my ice cube pillow * was * little melted last night. Might be time to carve a new one, eh? Ha. No…today my head is filled with a running to-do list that I should really ... Thu, 24 Jul 2008 13:46:51 GMT http://greasy.com/janetk/tuesday_morning.html I climbed the basement stairs late last night with a smile on my face. We made it through another layer, relatively unscathed. And our strength is that much thicker and our truth is that much stronger not despite the pain that needed to be released but because of it. And with every layer of hate that is destroyed, another layer of truth replaces it. Honesty, it seems, really is the best policy. And I’m still a bit gob smacked about the complete lack of honesty that was presented in the y ... Tue, 22 Jul 2008 14:40:13 GMT http://greasy.com/janetk/1216734192.html And Again * I wrote this yesterday afternoon, but my Internet connection was for shit so I couldn’t post it * It’s raining. Cold and hard. The weather forecast says that there is still some summer to come. But on days like today, it seems unlikely. It’s been a rough-ish morning with the girls. I’ll blame the rain and the anticipation for their Aunt Judy’s arrival. That’s just the way that kids are, I know. But it’s still annoying as Hell. I stepped outside just a moment or tw ... Tue, 22 Jul 2008 13:43:12 GMT http://greasy.com/janetk/1216733955.html And Again * I wrote this yesterday afternoon, but my Internet connection was for shit so I couldn’t post it * It’s raining. Cold and hard. The weather forecast says that there is still some summer to come. But on days like today, it seems unlikely. It’s been a rough-ish morning with the girls. I’ll blame the rain and the anticipation for their Aunt Judy’s arrival. That’s just the way that kids are, I know. But it’s still annoying as Hell. I stepped outside just a moment or tw ... Tue, 22 Jul 2008 13:39:15 GMT http://greasy.com/janetk/strange_truths.html “I’m in this prison you built for you…In this situation I don’t know what to do.” (Operation Ivy) I had a hard time waking up this morning. I remember the alarm going off and I remember Rock hitting the snooze button, even though that’s really not his style. He had a hard time getting up this morning, too, probably as a result of Saturday night’s camping trip with friends and another late night with me last night. Every day I vow to go to bed at a reasonable hour because with ... Mon, 21 Jul 2008 14:17:41 GMT http://greasy.com/janetk/distracted_randomness.html This is the longest I’ve spent in Greasy Land in a long, long time. I’ve been reading and while my interslice connection hasn’t been great, it’s been better than usual today and I managed to get onto everyone’s blogs and even leave comments without too much trouble (sorry, again, Gwen!). It was nice. To lose myself once again in everyone else’s life, letting the girls entertain Michael with their crazed antics and folding the laundry at a snail’s pace in between paragraphs. I ... Sun, 20 Jul 2008 19:48:21 GMT http://greasy.com/janetk/supposed_reading.html But I can’t hold this in. Nobody to write in cryptic style for anymore. And I just discovered that my hesitation and my writer’s block has more to do with that than I’d like to admit. I’m trying to re-train myself. To write in old school janetk style. It’s not working. Because there’s an intensity behind his eyes that is subtle but unmistakable. When he looks at me… when his eyes meet mine and hold…there is almost a kind of pleading behind them. His eyes search and dig and ... Wed, 16 Jul 2008 13:49:50 GMT http://greasy.com/janetk/wanna_talk.html When I started blogging last summer, everything and anything seemed like a good blogging topic. A trip to the park, a conversation with T, a session with M and Michael, even frustration with blogster, itself. It was all fair game and I blogged constantly, sometimes posting two or three times in one day. It was almost like the cap on my brain had been opened, or at least loosened somewhat, and my thoughts and words were pouring out of me. It felt amazing to be writing again, even if it was ... Sun, 13 Jul 2008 19:51:33 GMT http://greasy.com/janetk/weeks_part.html I’ll tell ya…there are few things that feel as wonderful in this world as descending the elevator in the Manchester airport and seeing my American Boy, looking anxious and excited, waiting for me. I still get a spinning ball of excitement in the pit of my stomach when I think about it. And in some ways, it is my favorite part. Walking across the small airport that I am now so comfortable within, teasing Don about parking in No Man’s Land, knowing that our two weeks together were just ... Fri, 11 Jul 2008 14:48:51 GMT http://greasy.com/janetk/explanations_decisions.html It’s been too long. I’m so far behind in the blogging world, I don’t think it’s even possible to contemplate catching up. Maybe if I spent an entire evening while the kids are in bed and the fan on the computer is humming away, reading and reading and reading, I could get about halfway but even that’s doubtful at this point. I’ve missed so many of you, have thought about you and am eager to read about what’s been going on in your little corners of the world (hey Tanya! I pass ... Tue, 8 Jul 2008 16:37:48 GMT http://greasy.com/janetk/friendlys_target_sex.html That about sums up my visit to America so far...Ha! No really... Today is the last day here in Gloucester, tomorrow we head for Vermont and then Friday, it's back to Canada for this girl. Back to the kids and the house and the land of ice and snow. Ha. Just kidding. *Actually*...there has been very little summer in this neck of the woods and it's pissing me off. What does America have against me and sunshine?! My point is that this adventure is not even half finished. We've only just begun ... Wed, 25 Jun 2008 16:41:25 GMT http://greasy.com/janetk/break.html Like DJ Lance Rock…you know…the strange, retro-lookin’ guy from Yo Gabba Gabba? That show is so fucking whacked. And I remember the first time I saw it, I commented to nobody in particular that I gave it half a season, at best, before it was pulled from Treehouse because what kid would want to watch those gumby like dudes break dancing as Elijah Wood be-bopped on screen? Turns out I was wrong. Really, really wrong. It’s a hit with the kids…and not just my equally whacked children ... Fri, 20 Jun 2008 13:35:34 GMT http://greasy.com/janetk/old_school_janetk.html Old school in that it’s going to be one of my patented point form posts. From back in the day. Okay, enough cheesy lingo… On with the post! · The little, brown mouse in the breezeway has started to grow on me. Go ahead and read that again, I know it’s hard to believe. Now before all of you fucked up mouse lovers out there get all excited and jazzed…only THIS mouse has started to grow on me. Not ALL mice. I still hate mice in general but this little guy has started to wear me down ... Wed, 18 Jun 2008 13:40:33 GMT http://greasy.com/janetk/lost.html I remember, quite some time ago, Gwen saying that her relationship with her now ex was like, “best friends who happened to share children” and I remember that statement really resounding with me. It summed up Rock and I, it seemed and I’ve used her words on numerous occasions while trying to describe what’s happened to my marriage. I think back to reading that line and wonder, now, how I could ever have identified with the statement. Rock and I couldn’t be further from it. It’s ... Fri, 13 Jun 2008 23:07:55 GMT http://greasy.com/janetk/mona_da_house.html Yep. That’s right. I’ve actually reduced the content of my blog posts to updates on the status of my period. Damn, that’s sad. She arrived late last night, which is always so shitty, isn’t it ladies? I used to be one of those people who could always catch her. She always knocked on the door first before throwing her shoes off and getting comfy with a bowl of Cheetos and a chocolate bar the size of my head. Not anymore. No… now she just throws the door open without so much as a ta ... Fri, 13 Jun 2008 13:39:25 GMT http://greasy.com/janetk/fck_post.html Answer this for me, please: Anyone else having trouble posting comments on blogs lately? Anyone else having trouble seeing the comments posted on their blog articles? I noticed it a few times yesterday, starting with me attempting to comment on Mary elkhound’s blog. And then this morning, the comments on my post, “A**holes, Airports and Whole Grain Bread” wouldn’t appear no matter how many times I refreshed the page. And I couldn’t comment yet again on the posts I read. What the ... Thu, 12 Jun 2008 13:42:23 GMT http://greasy.com/janetk/aholes_airports_grain_bread.html Don thinks he may need some Tuck’s medicated pads for the new asshole I ripped him in Monday’s post. If I told you where all of that anger and rage and hurt came from…if I shared with you what the conversations that nearly destroyed us were about, you would think it was a typo. You would scratch your head in disbelief and wonder what the fuck was wrong with us. If I told you how close we came to disintegration on Sunday * and * Monday, you would surely wonder how we could overcome so ... Wed, 11 Jun 2008 13:57:37 GMT http://greasy.com/janetk/shower_spider.html “Give me artificial, give me superficial, give me a commercial life that can’t be bought.” (Operation Ivy) A spider sat waiting for me in my shower this morning. Black And fat And maybe even a little bit hairy. A spider sat waiting for me in the corner of the shower, Encouraging me to write. But what would I say? That I am human? With moving parts? And a mother? And imperfections that make me real? And an overwhelming sense of disappointment gripping my heart? Maybe…. Or maybe I wo ... Mon, 9 Jun 2008 12:55:40 GMT http://greasy.com/janetk/janetks_list_distracting.html Today is Emma’s birthday party with her friends. I don’t know why I agree to these things, honestly. I don’t even like kids, especially the little girls she’s invited over for today. And quite frankly, I can’t really bring myself to do much in preparation. Not yet, anyway. I’m sure I’ll run around like a chicken with it’s head cut off a few hours before hand. But for right now, I just want to ignore the fact that in a few hours, my house will be full of giggling, shrieking, ... Sat, 7 Jun 2008 13:36:45 GMT http://greasy.com/janetk/courage.html “Courage is not the towering oak that sees storms come and go; it is the fragile blossom that opens in the snow.” -- Alice Mackenzie Swaim Michael is crawling. He started doing a version of crawling around the fifteen month mark and just recently, as we get closer and closer to the sixteen month age, he started * really * crawling. And now he’s a demon on all fours, scooting around the kitchen and dining room when released from the stifling confines of a high chair, finding shreds of ... Fri, 6 Jun 2008 13:26:46 GMT