Friday evening a tag from the post office arrived in the mail. A tag that I expected to arrive some time next week. A tag which included some unexpected taxes and tariffs that I was sure I had already paid. (Apparently not.) A tag that I would exchange for my wedding dress.

J squawked at the steep fees and offered to pay half, but I declined his considerate gesture. Call me Ms. Independent, but I really don't want him chipping in for my wedding dress. Besides, I rationalized that even with the additional fees, my dress is still less than half of what I'd pay at any bridal shop. Sorry, but I simply don't buy the excuse that, "It's you're wedding dress -- it's okay to spend $1,000+. You're only going to do it once." Exactly... you're only going to wear it ONCE (or in my case, twice), so why spend that much coin when you can cut out the overhead by ordering your dress online and then have it shipped to you three times as fast. Mind you, I did go to a bridal store first to try on some dresses to see what I liked, and *then* I went online to order.(On that note, my apologies to any of you out there in blogland who work in bridal shops and hate wasting your time on potential customers like me. But seriously... why do bridal shops gouge people the way they do?!) Okay... getting off my pulpit now.

Anyhow, I ran across the street to the post office, coughed up the fee and left with a big box in tow. I walked up the three stories to our apartment, with the box balanced on my hip, overcome with excitement with just the slightest hint of butterflies. Over the last few weeks, I've visited the bridal website numerous times, staring at my dress, hoping that it lives up to expectations. Now was the moment of truth.

I ran off to the bedroom and asked J to please stay put in the living room. He obliged. I carefully cut the box open. On top sat the tiara I had selected -- a free gift for ordering. It was even nicer than I had expected. I balanced the tiara on my head and played around in the mirror. My hair and makeup were all blah after a day at the office, so I felt like I couldn't do the pretty headpiece much justice. I'm sure it'll look far nicer when my hair n' makeup are all fresh on our wedding day.

Next came the shawl. I wrapped it around my shoulders. It was much wider than I had expected, so I folded it in half. I hadn't considered ordering a shawl, but it was automatically included with the dress. Plus, with the tattoo on my back, it might not be a bad idea to use it in some pictures. Ideally, I would like to trace over my tattoo in silver paint -- I think that would look really cool, as my tattoo is a pretty tribal butterfly-like design -- but unfortunately, even though my double-jointed shoulders enable me to reach the middle of my back, I still can't turn my head 180 degrees. Maybe I can get someone to do it for me at the reception.

There was also a matching purse included in the package, which was super cute. I admired it's delicate beadwork. I doubt I'll need it at the wedding, but maybe I'll bring it to our reception.

Finally, I had saved the best for last. Wrapped in plastic, my dress resembled a big duvet or pillow. I pulled it from it's cocoon, and noticed that it was turned inside out to protect all the beading. I carefully turned it right-side out, and was delightfully surprised that it even more beautiful in person than on the website. I laced up the back, (which took damn near forever), and then tried to slip it on.

I immediately found myself lost in a web of crinoline, of which I couldn't navigate my way through. I tried again, but took another wrong turn. Third time is the charm. With one arm through the top, I tried to wiggle the rest of my body to follow its lead -- I swear to an outsider I must've looked like I was drowning in a sea of French taffeta. I quickly discovered that I had laced the bodice up too tight and my shoulders could not squeeze through.

I could hear J on the other side of the door, reminding me of our dinner plans and asking if I'd be much longer. Exhausted, I decided to call it quits for the day, fold it up and put it away until the next morning. Ha. Folding... Yeah, I'm going to have a delightful time trying to trek this beast around Europe. I'm hoping that once I get two feet cut off the bottom (because I'm such a shorty), that it'll make the packing a bit easier... although I'm sure it will still present its challenges.

Once I had the dress back in it's box, I let J in the room. Flopped on the bed, my hair a disheveled mess, I'm sure I looked more like I had been in a bar fight instead of trying on my wedding gown.

"Did you try it on?" J asked.

"No, I couldn't figure it out," I laughed. "I'm really going to have to practice."

So the next morning, that's exactly what I did. I loosened the laces, but found myself getting stuck. I worried that if I *really* got stuck, I'd have to call J for assistance... and there's no way I can do that! I'd like to keep some surprises from him. I managed to pull myself from the bodice's clutches and loosened the laces a bit more. But even this time, I still found that my shoulders could not push all the way through. Third time is the charm. I completely unlaced half the back and slipped the dress on with ease, and then pulled the laces tight. In case it isn't obvious, I've already decided that I'm definitely going to need help come wedding day, as there is no way I'll *ever* be able to do up this crazy thing by myself.

I stepped up on a chair so I could see the full length of the dress in the mirror. It's so beautiful! I really surprised myself with how much I dig the whole fru-fru look... because that's typically so not me.

Since I had just gotten back from the hairdressers, my hair was looking especially nice, (for once -- it never seems to last long) so I tried the tiara on a second time. I couldn't help but beam from ear to ear with excitement. I love it. Now I see why that site has a million testimonials on it. The dress is absolutely perfect, perfect, perfect.

However, packing it up will be another story...

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