As a child I would question myself quite often: If people didn't like me, would I want them to tell me or would I wish to think that they really liked me. I always came up with the same answer. I would want to know. Even as a child I didn't like myself much. I still don't. I can see why others wouldn't. It makes perfect sense to me.

This is probably one reason that I hadn't used a picture over at Blogster and cropped mine so much here. Even so, I always blog anonymously.. I don't show up on the front or in lists of those recently on. I don't want people to know. I even invented another "me" to use when I didn't want anyone to know that I was on, but still felt compelled to answer someone. The anonymous me... some of you know who it is. Most of you don't know. That's good for me.

Me... I don't know how to explain me. I am shy... You know that. I am quiet and self-conscious. I was praised only for my intelligence growing up. How good is that when you're a girl? The movies told me you had to be vivacious, popular, had a killer body... none of this is me. I was good in academics in school and hated physical education, art, music. I disliked things that would reveal anything about me. I once cried when we were introduced to water color painting because I had to paint something. I didn't wish to show that part of me. To this day, I do paint, but I paint landscapes... the very same thing over and over... sky, sea, trees, fields. Nothing else.

The music I like are high voiced male singers... yodeling, falsettos... Here is a player with the kinds of things I like. I have posted some of them before. It is revealing, but I don't know what it reveals. The theme of the song really doesn't matter to me. So the songs can be old or new. I don't know any new songs. YouTube has helped me find some that are relatively new, but not current. There are no current songs in this player.